Can't sleep

Ugh can't sleep... I think I'm an emotional mess sometime yea I guess its the last thing a captain should be, but damn. I've been cheated on, lied to by lovers and friends, stabbed in the back, things ripped away from, how am I still standing, what keeps me going?

Gods help me If I become a monster, I never want to be a monster or bad guy, I don't like to hurt people but they like to hurt me :(.

I think I'm gonna take a litte drive around Jupiter or something maybe Saturn